Thought you’d be on cloud nine, but can’t stop crying? Between 50% and 70% of mums suffer from the “baby blues” in the first few days after their baby’s birth.

This mild depression usually kicks in three or four days after the baby if born, and often coincides with very uncomfortable breasts when the milk comes in.

Hormone crash

The possible causes of the baby blues range from hormone levels coming crashing down after the chemical high of childbirth, or physical exhaustion, to feeling overwhelming responsibility for or anxiety about your tiny new baby. Some mums even report feeling a sense of anti-climax once the baby arrives, after such a long and exciting journey through pregnancy and birth.

Not PND

The most important thing to remember is that baby blues is not the same aspostnatal depression: it’s completely normal, lasts a short time – days or even just a few hours – and disappears by itself without the need for medical treatment. If the baby blues doesn’t seem to be lifting and you are concerned that it’s something more serious, talk to your health visitor or GP.

A mum's view

Here’s how some mums experienced the baby blues:

• “Breastfeeding was hard and made me a bit down in the early days. I went to the NCT breastfeeding drop-in centre which was brilliant. I cried quite a lot, but have a wonderful husband who just cuddled me and made me laugh.”
• “I was definitely more emotional than normal. First time around you think that you are being normal – it’s only with hindsight that you can see that you were slightly crazy! A lot of it is down to tiredness, but it’s an overwhelming tiredness. Rest really helps, and an understanding husband.”
• “When my milk came in I had three days of being a mentalist and then it passed.”
• “I remember the first few days with my son, when he and I were learning to breastfeed, and not learning terribly quickly. I remember tears of frustration and pain and felt in despair at times. But twice a day while my husband was on paternity leave, he would present me with a slice of chocolate cake and a lovely cup of coffee. I can’t tell you how much I looked forward to that chocolate cake.”
• “I think I cried every day for the first few weeks after both my children were born, not about anything in particular – I was just exhausted and refused to rest properly.”
• “It was my birthday five days after my twins were born and I spent most of that day crying every time I read a birthday card or received flowers.”

The expert view

Mums’ coach Amanda Alexander (www.coachingmums.co.uk) says even though you might feel like the only new mum who’s not blissed-out by motherhood, you’re not alone: “Only one of my new mum friends confessed to feeling low to me, and I to her. The others were all saying how wonderful everything was, and I wondered what was wrong with me.

“It was only a couple of years later that they were reminiscing about the baby blues that I realised that we all experienced the same thing. Some people cope (seemingly) by presenting a happy face in public. You don’t know what goes on behind closed doors, and even if it seems like it, you are not the first or last new mum to feel low in the early days.”

She suggests keeping an achievement diary as a way of proving to yourself that things are getting better. “No matter how small, record your daily achievement. You need to redefine achievement in the early days of being a new mum, so “had a shower and dried my hair” would be an achievement. Going to the supermarket is up there with climbing Mount Everest in the first month! You will notice how little by little, you are emerging from the smog of the early days to a bright new dawn.”

In the early days of motherhood, forget about taking each day at a time – take each minute at a time. And when it comes to the baby blues – and almost every other challenge of motherhood - remember: “This too shall pass”.

For more information, contact the Association for Postnatal Illness: http://apni.org/