When it’s time to go back to work, both you and your baby may need time to adjust to childcare. You may find leaving your baby with someone else very hard at first. We suggest ways of making the change as smooth as possible.

Make it gradual

In order to minimise the stress of going back to work for both of you, try to take a couple of days’ holiday during the first week, or just go back for half days. This is for you as much as your baby, as you are likely to be tired, and getting a routine sorted with all the planning and packing of changing bags will probably take longer at first. Go easy on yourself, adapt gradually, and you’ll feel happier.

Tips to get you back into your stride

Do a ‘dummy run’ into work before you go back:

• Get up for a normal working day, and get yourself and the baby ready.
• Aim to travel through the rush hour so that you can see how busy the traffic is.
• You may be taking a different route now, so it will help to check out traffic conditions.

Start preparing:

• What will you wear? Have a look at your work clothes and make sure they are all ready for you. If you haven’t lost all your pre-pregnancy weight, don’t be down – buy a couple of new outfits in a larger size. It’ll boost your confidence, you’ll look good, and you’ll be more comfortable.
• Warn your colleagues that you may be arriving late and leaving early for a little while. It may not happen, but at least people will have been prepared for it.
• Don’t plan any meetings for first or last thing in the day, in case you are running late, or they run over time.
• Ask your childminder or nursery if you can ring them frequently during the first week. Don’t worry about doing this – you will not be the first!
• If your baby is crying when you leave, ask their carer to ring you later when he is asleep.
  Ask your carer to ring you if your baby needs you. Once you know this is what they’ll do, you can relax in the knowledge that your baby is fine unless you hear otherwise.
• Postpone social arrangements for the first couple of weeks unless they are quite low key.

Emotional support

Talking and being heard is the best form of emotional support you can have. Talk to your partner about how you are feeling. He may be feeling anxious about his role in this new phase, too, so be sure to give him the opportunity to have his say. He may also need you to tell him how he can help you.

Don’t forget to share the responsibility if you can. If you are a single mum or dad, try to get to know others by joining organisations, and talking to others who are in the same situation.

Join groups outside work with young babies. You can then get to know local parents with babies of the same age so that you can socialise in the evenings and at weekends. Remember, children in high quality childcare are as successful, happy and rounded as other children. You will probably take longer to adjust to childcare than your baby does.

Remember to choose a childcare setting that has:

• Lots of one-to-one contact with your baby.
• Friendly, caring staff.
• The same face or faces day in, day out, with a low staff turnover.

Being a working parent involves juggling, worries, late nights, early mornings... but once you have adjusted, you will forget that life was ever any different!

Settling in

Your baby will need to develop a strong relationship with his new carer – don’t worry, that doesn’t mean that he will love you any less. You can make it easier for him, and the best way to do that is to give him the chance to settle in gradually.

Visit your nursery or childminder several times before you go back to work. Stay with your baby the first time. The next time you go, you stay for a while, then leave for, say, half an hour. Later on, you will be able to leave for a couple of hours. After that you should be able to leave him there for a whole session. You can do the same sort of thing at home if you are employing a nanny.