Are children bad for your career?

In this age of 'having it all,' working mums now have more rights than ever before.

But despite growing acceptance of flexible hours and home-working, a third of mums reckon their employers turn against them when they return from maternity leave.

Working mums poll

According to a Bounty poll of 3,000 working mums:

  • Almost one in five were demoted without warning when they returned to work.
  • A quarter walked back into the office to discover they had been replaced by someone else.
  • Half claimed that having a baby had a negative effect on their career.
  • 26% said they were forced to take a pay cut, due to the employers' belief that they wouldn't be able to do the job part-time.
  • 49% said they had missed out on promotions and other work opportunities, despite grafting hard.

"Not enough flexibility is offered to mothers to help them balance family life with a career," says Bounty's Ian Beswetherick. "Mums should receive support from employers. They have battled with their priorities to return, so should be offered respect for doing so."

"The fact of the matter is that many mums work harder than ever before when they return to work as they are afraid to be seen as part-timers. They are keen to prove to colleagues that they are just as capable as they were before."

What Bounty mums think

Here are just a few of your experiences from the Bounty community:

  • "During my maternity leave everyone had a pay rise apart from me. I was told that I had just had six months' holiday!" Beccy31
  • "My employer has been amazing. She let me choose my hours when I came back and lets me work from home and turn up whenever I feel like it. I find it a struggle when all I want to do in the evenings is flop in front of the TV, but I'd rather do that than leave lo in daycare." Hugearse
  • "Having kids has actually improved my career! I wasn't able to go back to my old job due to the shifts involved. I was then redeployed to a better job with more responsibilities and higher up the ladder. I do work for a local council and appreciate redeployment isn't always an option, but for me it's been fantastic!" Smuffie
  • "My boss stopped talking to me when I advised him I was pregnant because it caused him great inconvenience. Since being back I've had my hours cut from full time to three days a week, but still have to fit the same amount of work in."Samanthajay
  • "I have only recently returned and am full time but do feel that I have to work twice as hard to prove myself and that my bosses expect me to not put as much into my job as I used to." Cazbirdy
  • "My old job wasn't family friendly. Very few had kids and those that did were made to feel worthless, especially if kids were ill etc. Had I gone back I would have had to pay childcare that would have been almost my salary." Sammieb747
  • "My manager has been great and lets me do flexible working hours and is always understanding when I need any time off. Saying that, I know there is no chance I will ever get promoted doing part-time hours, which I think is wrong." ShirlsRead
  • "Having kids has given me two big promotions! It was only when I had left to go on maternity each time that they realised just how important I was to the company! I only work three days a week and they want me full-time but I have said no and I'm sticking to it for the next few years at least." AK2004
 

Comments

Submitted by olive93 on Thu, 25/08/2011 - 06:31.
I made a concious decision not to go back to work. The hours would leave me no time to be with my children and I would have to pay out too much intravel expences and have to pay for childcare. I personally think there is not enough focus on family. The government talk about getting mothers back to work but make it impossible to do so. And it does not help with discrimination from your employers. I also think that you can't have it all as society tells you differently. Choices have to be made. Children or career.
Submitted by barcelona2000 on Tue, 21/12/2010 - 19:12.
It is believed that nowadays the workplace is very open to motherhood and that it welcomes back woman after maternity leave. I don't believe this is the case, unless you are at director level or own your own business, of course. I have experienced the whole flexible work issue after 1 year on maternity. As required, I submitted a form for temporary flexible working (temporary for 2 months only and then return full time) until I managed to settle my child into nursery full time. After a couple of meetings to discuss how I would manage this, it was rejected with the same old chestnut, how was I going to fit, a full time job into less hours? I understand the employers situation, however, bearing in mind that the flexible work would be for a 2 month period only, I felt that after all my valued hard work, I had been rejected and left feeling like a weak 2nd class citizen. During my meetings, I was compared to other people who returned to work after 3 months of having a baby as if that was standard and what 'career' woman should do. All I can say is every mother is different and employers should respect that. I am now seeking employment but feel that, in order to be excepted back into the workplace, and particularly in a new role, it would go against me if I mention I am now a mother. A very sad state of affairs!
Submitted by Tanyad81 on Tue, 30/11/2010 - 10:34.
My boss didnt talk to me properly once I told him I was pregnant and within 25 days he sacked me! I was a retail store manager with the co. for 3yrs and even after he sacked me he refused to speak to me or give me reason, this is now going to a tribunal but has caused so much upset in my life, I went from £380pw to £65pw jsa I no longer feel like an independant woman but just another statistic on the "dole" its soul destroying as no one will employ me more than halfway thru my pregnancy! I never had a sick day even though the first 4mths were hell with morning sickness. Now all I can hope for is a good outcome at the tribunal. No one understands what its like to lose your job in the middle of pregnancy when you live to work and its suddenly taken away from you all because your having an little baby...its left me wondering where i'll find the confidence next year to go back to work once my baba is here!
Submitted by tigerlillyd02 on Wed, 17/11/2010 - 01:08.
I'd taken on a baby who was 6 months old and didn't get any time off at all. First child too. Work were very good in giving me time off to attend meetings and court prior to having the baby and were very good with allowing me to increase and reduce my hours once he came to me. I found it exhausting though in all honesty, working full time and dealing with a very sickly baby who wasn't sleeping through the night. I thought my work suffered as a result. Unfortunately, my relationship broke down soon after taking on the baby and I had to move out of the area to be with family, and they even let me leave without working my notice of 2 months. I do wonder if they were just pleased to get rid of the problem (me) or if they were genuinly being helpful. I loved my job and now not working at all. I'm wondering what to do next...
Submitted by mitch43 on Wed, 10/11/2010 - 09:28.
When i was discussing flexible working hours with my boss, he instantly dismissed it, I wanted to work full time, but work 1 day at home (often I took work home--unpaid) so I knew it could be done. He wouldn't budge. The answer I got was how do I know that you would be working.........and not shopping! I went ballastic. I only do 4days now, I don't take any work home and do not do any favours for him at all. I am glad I only do the 4days now, it wasn't worth my working the 5days as would be working for nothing by the time I was paying for child care. I do miss the money though.
Submitted by sarahmarchant on Tue, 02/11/2010 - 14:46.
when i returned to work everyones opinions changed no one invited me to staff parties cause they asumed I had no life now I was given limited work even tho before I left I was fully trained to do almost everythin suddenly now im not (even banned from one area) managers didnt take me seriously when I wanted to be promoted to add to all that I always have eavnin shifts so i lost alot of sleep, I was respected without kids but its so hard to find a job these days I cant leave for a better job
Submitted by SallyB1966 on Wed, 15/09/2010 - 14:26.
My boss seemed very happy about my returning to work part-time, but then said that I had to take a cut to my rate of pay for doing the same job at the same level with the same responsibilities.
Submitted by mandchapman on Wed, 25/08/2010 - 15:39.
My experience to date is the goverment legislation looks good but there are so many holes in it that it just sounds like parents (mums) get more support than they did years ago. But in reality employers totally ignore it and these days both parents have to work unless they are playing the system and obtaining handouts. Employers want full time workers. Qualifications, experience and skills mean nothing unless you are prepared to leave family at the front door and work a min. 40 hour week. There is no need for this - at most companies part time hours and job shares would work but employers are frightened to set what they see as a presidence, instigating many other similar requests. Maybe this time, with this company I will be 3rd time lucky ino my application for a 27hr working week. If not I have no idea what I should do, sell the house? but if I jack in until my DD starts school there will be no going back to the IT industry as my experience will have lapsed. How is it fair? I worked hard, I got the grades. I want to pay my own way? I want to keep our house? but I just want time with my family until they start primary school rather than handing them over to strangers at nurseries for them to enjoy the most precious and valuable part of my world.
Submitted by marsinah on Fri, 20/08/2010 - 14:51.
I returned to work when our daughter was 5 months old and received a lot of support from my manager. She made sure that I felt fit and confident to return and negotiated the hours so that my husband and I could find adequate child care to fit our work schedules. I feel very fortunate that my manager was so open to ensure there was some flexibility on my return, especially as I requested to do part-time hours. After being back for 6 months, [and our daughter about to turn 1 year old] I recently applied for a full-time position and was accepted. Yeah! I know the next few months will be tough going though in terms of handling tiredness and ensuring that I spend enough quality time with my daughter and husband, but right now I couldn't be happier.
Submitted by Jakena on Tue, 17/08/2010 - 19:42.
I've been back at work 6 weeks now. Gone back full time. Although I feel as if i've upset their plans as everyone told me I was supposed to do a different job when I got back part time, but because I wasn't wanting to change my hours I've upset their plans as they've had to give me my old job back. The person doing my maternity cover is still there doing my job and they are trying to hold onto her leaving me with not much to do so they've put me on 'projects'. Returning from work I'd rather just get on with my job rather be left floating about not knowing whats going on.
 

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