Understanding tantrums

Is your child suffering from the terrible twos? If so you’re not alone, 75% of toddlers regularly lose it so don’t despair, understanding why tantrums occur, and what you can do to deal with them, is the key to stopping them in their tracks.

What is a tantrum?

Aside from being a very public display of your parenting skills, a tantrum is really about your child realising that he/she is a separate person, with their own voice and views who doesn’t want to be told what to do by anyone i.e. you, his/her friends, relatives or even grandparents. For this reason when your child feels out of control for any reason, they become overwhelmed by their feelings, and experience a flood of emotions, which triggers a tantrum.

Find out more on:

How to spot the signs of a tantrum

How to cope when it happens to you

Comments

Submitted by TweetyMoo on Wed, 25/08/2010 - 15:44.
I have Twins girls who are 20months old now and one of my twins has a very bad tantrums and it isn't fair on her sister that she was getting all the attention so at first i didn't know what to do but now i don't give her the attention and i tell her no and it does seem to work but i've also started using reverse Psychology on her and her tantrums have calmed down alot and now she is alot happier playing with her sister and everyone who is around her i hope this helps everyone
Submitted by redcat85 on Tue, 01/06/2010 - 20:58.
my wee boy is 14 months and the last few weeks has started to have tantrums- he will bite kick and hit-when i tell him he bold he hits back and screamms so hard he sounds like he is throat im worried and im getting so stressed i dont no how to cope
Submitted by Anonymous on Wed, 21/04/2010 - 21:23.
my 14 month old daughter is the same, she has even managed to give me a black eye! i dont have all the answers but the only thing i do is let her know that she wont get attention when she behaves this way, and i back this up by praising her when she stops. i hope this phase doesnt last for a long time.
Submitted by Anonymous on Wed, 21/04/2010 - 11:51.
i have a 4 year old and she is always having a tantrum i've tryed to talk to her but i dont seem to get anywhere with her is there any information you could give me to try and carm her tantrums down
Submitted by Anonymous on Tue, 20/04/2010 - 20:12.
My son (14 month) has been brushing his teeth for a few months now and loves it. I tend to give him is tooth brush when he is in the bath and I also brush my teeth at the same time so he mimics me. He will often try and brush my teeth too with his brush which he finds very funny! Hope this helps
Submitted by Teresajayne on Wed, 07/04/2010 - 16:08.
My son is 14 months old and he's been having tantrums for about a month now, if he doesn't get his own way he hits me or the nearest person or baby next to him or throws whatever is in his hands the infomation above is very good but he doesn't really know what i'm saying to him when i go by the info above. Can anyone help?
Submitted by lufinu1980 on Wed, 07/04/2010 - 11:01.
My little boy is 20 months old and also has found out what a tantrum is too. We did try the ignoring method but found the tantrum would stop on it's own but we would be left with him whining after. We have found unless they are because he is tired (nothing seems to work then) we have started to use a version of a naughty corner. Although we don't think he understands time out for bad behaviour yet, we do put him in one particular spot and stay with him (trying to stay clam myself!) until he starts to calm down. Once the drama is over I then ask him if he has finsihed and get him to give me a cuddle to show its all water under the bridge. I have found after only a week or two now that the time spent there is shorter and that by just asking if he wants to go in the corner when a tantrum is starting he usually calms down straight away. This may not work for you, each family has their own method but I hopefully it's something you can try. Good luck.
Submitted by tricky25 on Thu, 01/04/2010 - 21:22.
You need to talk to tour husband and let him know that he's upsetting you when he shout at your toddler. Your son learns by example, and your husband shouting at him just makes him worse. Ignore your sons tantrums and any other bad behavior too. But don't forget to praise him when he's done good! Also try to spend a little more time with your toddler as he may be feeling jealous with a new baby. Hope it goes well. X
Submitted by micht26 on Wed, 31/03/2010 - 19:58.
My son is 20 months and has been having his little tantrums for a while now, but as he's getting older the tantrums are lasting longer. For example yesterday he woke up in a bad mood and had tantrums all morning, didn't want his milk,insisted in not getting dressed and ran away when he saw his pushchair. I'm used to his little tantrums now and usually tend to ignore him and let him let everything out. Sometimes I lay him down on the floor so he doesn't hurt himself, but when he sees that his tantrums are not bothering me he soon stops. I have found that the more attention you give your little one when they're having an episode the worst it gets, so try to ignore and get past that.
Submitted by sai211 on Tue, 30/03/2010 - 12:04.
my son is 17 months and i just had a new baby girl. my sons trantrums are gettign really bad as he cries at everything and shouts so loud!! i feel like a bad mother as i am exhausted. my husband deals with him most of the time but h just shouts at him and it upses me so much. please help. any tips would be good. thanks.
 

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