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pregnancy

Things not to discuss with a pregnant woman

Everyone wants to talk to you when you're pregnant, but should avoid some of these...

Conversations worth avoiding with a pregnant woman

These conversations are best shelved when talking to a pregnant woman

Pregnancy woman chatting

Being pregnant puts you very much in the public eye - strangers smile at you on the train and, sometimes, offer you a seat. People you vaguely know offer words of congratulations and tips on getting through labour. And everyone seems to want to touch your growing bump - or at least comment on it. It’s like you’ve become public property!

There are conversations, however, that you should not initiate with a pregnant woman - don’t forget being hormonal, tired, and probably hungry is a dangerous combination.

1. When are you due?

A common question that should be avoided. She may look like she’s going to go into labour any minute but if she still has three months to go, it’s red faces all round. Let her tell you when her baby is due.

2. Do you know if it’s a girl or a boy?

If she does, she’s may not want to tell you. Don’t put her in an awkward position. 

3. Wow, you’re massive

Mentioning pregnancy weight gain is a no-go. She knows about the large bump, she’s carrying it around all day and lying awake with it most of the night. Don’t go there.

4. Is it twins?

As above. If she was carrying multiples, she probably would have mentioned it by now.

5. A woman I know had a 48-hour labour/12-lb baby

Labour is so-called for a reason. We have been to the classes, seen the videos and are aware it’s not going to be a walk in the park. Scare stories about mammoth labours and huge babies do not help!

6. So are you going to give up work?

She might, or she might not have even decided yet. However, she won’t want to defend or explain her choice or become embroiled in a working vs stay-at-home argument before she’s even had the child.

7. You look very tired

If someone tells you that you look tired, they usually mean you look awful. Not what a pregnant woman needs to hear. Blooming is a nice word - use that instead, even if it’s a white lie!

8. Do you think you should be eating/drinking/doing that?

Don’t make judgements. She may have been craving a can of cola or a large pizza, it doesn’t mean she does it every day!


Things not to discuss with a pregnant woman